Nun in a supermarket stocking up on boozewonders which brand of gin to choose?Gordon's? London? Tanqueray?stick ‘em in the trolley - I haven’t got all day!I’m busy worshiping the Trinityice and a slice and a shot or three!
Have you ever been dumped in the bath?I can tell you now it's not much of a laugheven if you weren't a girlfriend so goodyno-one deserves to be dumped in the nuddy
Have you ever worked in a public library?if you did it would drive you blinkin’ barmyyou’d get more peace if you joined the armyserving customers should be so rewardingbut trust me you’d prefer waterboarding
I really love my furry pussyshe makes my heart go soft and mushyyet she’s a pain in the arse and extremely fussylives a pampered life that’s ever so cushy
Thursday I am renaming you Thirst-dayfor I’m feeling rather thirsty todaythree pots of tea and two pints of juiceI’m downing more fluids than a hospital sluice
